The past few days of my life had been rather at peace. Not that things have changed their course, but I had. I had decided to spend my time speaking less and listening more. Seeing less and observing more. How is the social setup around us? There can be varied answers to this particular question depending upon how you broaden or narrow down your perspective. Or, that what dimension of the social setup are you approaching. Ponder upon this for a while and see the varied aspects that come to your mind.
I am talking about the thinking pattern of the people. Where their priorities and worries lie and what matters to them the most. Maybe you guessed it, maybe you didn't. In any case there's more to it. For starters, one thing is for sure that the major force driving human behavior is the tendency to be accepted, to be socially accepted as one of them as one of interesting personality with amusing qualities. If you ask me, there are very few who want to stand out. The rest just want to be accepted as a part of the whole.
Then there is the second theory (obviously already theorized by some psychologist. Still have the patience to hear it again); that the way people bond quickly is by criticizing a third subject.The third can be a person, it can be some event, etc.
Then there's my third theory, that such bonding solely based upon criticism doesn't last long.
Combining all these three we get the kind of people we all see around us. The kind of people I see you complaining about in your status messages, in the quotes your with the caption #truetocore #bitchesbebitches
Actually what I am talking about is the tendency of the human mind to keep itself busy all the time. The need to amuse it. We all find little risks exciting, don't we? Be it the risk of being caught criticizing the third person beind their back. And, why won't one risk it? It carries the mouthful reward of increasing social bonding, and being accepted into the desirous group as someone who's "not a total bore", if I may. The functional perspective would be that such negative social interaction is functional to increase self demand and put oneself in attention. This is usually done not with the intention of demeaning the person but, increasing self worth.
I am observing these tertiary relationships all around me. And it is upon close observation that I devolve upon this conclusion. As Sheldon ( from The Big Bang Theory ) would say: this is what tertiary friends are for, bitch it on!
At this point it is vital to differentiate between 1. When criticism comes into the communication first and then does bonding.
2. When people have bonded and then they indulge into criticism.
I am talking of the relationships of the first kind. The third theory solely applies to this kind. Afterall, one who isn't good to others behind their back, isn't good to you behind yours [ citation needed].
Now, I leave you at this conjuncture to revisit your thoughts which I had invoked in the beginning and weight the views I have pur forward.
Till then, be a social butterfly!
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